Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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