I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
