im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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