btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Randomize
