Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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