wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
