I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
