Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I don't �care how much you're grieving �a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.�
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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