Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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