just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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