you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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