just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
