he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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