You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Randomize
