I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
