oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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