i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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