i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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