We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
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