he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
