No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
