My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
