We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I would ride that face into the sunset
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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