butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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