Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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