i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
