"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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