Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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