Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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