I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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