kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
