Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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