is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
