I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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