So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
