fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
