she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
