Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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