Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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