he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
