So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
i've created a new STD.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Randomize
