She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Damn victory sex feels great
My vagina is very pro this idea
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
