So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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