as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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