Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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