If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
