...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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