i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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