i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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