how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Two words: nipple clamps
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